End of Year

This------------------------------>
Just makes me laugh.

The holidays are almost over. Jack made out like a bandit, and doesn't even realize it. All he knew on Holiday was that things were bright and shiny and that it was okay to shovel massive amounts of wrapping paper into his mouth.

He got loads of clothes and toys, and Jen and I got cash and gift cards. I cannot think of a better Christmas.

To all of you wondering where the hell the Christmas card or gift are, please remember that we are new parents and a little distracted, which means we are broke and tired and just didn't get around to it. We love you anyway. Do you really need a card to prove it? If so you are a shallow, shallow friend.

Non-demoninational Holiday

This --------------------------->
Will sicken you with cuteness.
Don't say I didn't warn you.

So, the holidays are here. I suppose you could say they have been here since Turkish Day, and they we are in the thick of it.
I am excited for wee Jack to see his first Christmas. He doesn't know why, but he's really excited. The coming years will be even more fun, as he will learn about the mystical Amazon who will deliver packages for weeks leading up to Dec. 25th, and then again for a little while after that. "why doesn't The Amazon deliver all on one day like Santa?" he will ask. "Because The Amazon doesn't have a magic sleigh, and has to rely on UPS," I will tell him. "But The Amazon does have elves. Clad in dark brown shorts and named Malone, but elves nonetheless," If the creators of this holiday had envisioned what the mail-order industry would become, they would have tailored their story to include it, and it would have helped out parents the whole world over. And there wouldn't be the awkward few years where belief slips away. The Amazon will deliver forever. Perhaps we could all band together, and slowly change the tradition to include The Amazon. We could get the UPS elves' union to agree (for a fee) to hold all packages, and deliver them all on Christmas day. This could eliminate the kids finding their presents hidden away in the bottom of a closet, or as my mom did, in the trunk of her car. They would have to rely on their hacking skills and crack into Dad's email instead. It would also add the the fun of opening a shipping package and the wrapped present. Oh what fun!
Who's with me?

Lies! All Lies!

This------------------------>
Is Jackson with Santa. It is a weird thing to decide to lie to your kid for years on end. Setting yourself up for the eventual time when the kid figures it out, and then you have a bunch of backpedleing to do. I suppose that just like buying a pet that you know you will outlive (unless it is a turtle), the good times and fun will far out weigh the time spent at the funeral. In my case, there was never a big deal, it just sort of trailed off. I remember figuring it out when I realized that Santa had the exact same handwriting as my mother.

It did have ramifications involving my religious beliefs. After finding out about Santa and the Easter Bunny, God and Jesus didn't stand a chance. At least the other two stopped by once a year and gave me something.


Jack did seem to enjoy his outfit however.

Nuthin'!

We got nuthin' !
Sure it got cold, but the storm passed to the east of Stillwater, and for the most part we got very little snow. Sad, The residents here still have no idea how to deal, and the most dangerous part of driving is the other drivers, who should just stay home if they are going to act like that.

Random Thoughts:

This------------->
Is a random pic of the D. I like it, so I'm sharing it with you.

"You can catch more flies with honey..."

I have no idea how that ends.

As a child, for some reason, I always wanted a pet rabbit. I don't know why, and it was never a deep desire. I just thought it might be kind of cool. Then, in my mid 20s, some friends of mine had rabbits that they kept in a cute little pen in their back yard, and I decided to go check it out. I realized that they don't really 'play' and that they smell awful. Not ferret bad, but bad. That small desire left my system, and I got a fish instead.

Bundle-fly

This--------------->
Is coming our way. It is to be the coldest air and the meanest storm Oklahoma has seen in over a decade.

amateurs!

Just as those up north are overly terrified of tornadoes, The southern states are scared of snow. Oklahoma gets both and can't deal with either. All competing weather systems seem to butt heads right over OK, allowing for really freaky storms that last about two minutes. When I moved here almost three years ago, I was worried that I wouldn't be able to enjoy the snow and cold that I love so much. Three weeks after we moved, a giant blizzard hit the state, shutting down half the infrastructure, closing schools and offices for three days. I was happy. It hasn't really snowed since. We'll see how this one turns out.

The first time I went to Austin to visit friends, it was in the last week of August. A wee bit warm for my tastes. Here is a conversation I had while watching the news one day:

Weatherman: The temperature is 101, but the heat index is 120!
Me: What the hell is the "heat index"
Beth: Well, because of the humidity, it feels hotter than it actually is.
Me: Oh, like the wind-chill factor.
Beth: The what?

Thanksgiving Weekend

This --------------------------->
Is what happens when your friends have way too much free time and access to an animal carcass. We had a lovely time in Denver City Denver. We did not get to see some of the people we wanted, so sorry to those people. My bad, really. We had a lot going on.
Turkish dei was yet again free of any mention of Istanbul, Constantinople or this country's proud eastern European heritage. Sad.




This--------------------------->

Is how Saturday started at Craig's house, and it just spiraled from there. Drunk babies and toddlers hanging from chandeliers and sliding down the banisters and taking passers-by hostage. Total mayhem. We had a good time.



This----------------------------->
Is why we flew and didn't drive. Let me tell you, this trip went off without a hitch while the day before and the day after our flights were delay crazy. A giant snow storm hit the mountains and the eastern plains, but missed DCD all together. We had no mishaps at all. Weird. It was by far the most relaxing trip home since I left. Including before we had a kid. Jackson did really well on the plane. No fussing or anything. At one point he was the hit of the plane as he flirted and giggled at the two college hotties sitting behind us. Good man. I never had the balls to hit on two at once, though I was never that cute.

Roadrunner, Roadrunner!

I saw one of these------------>
On my way to lunch yesterday. Just bookin' it. I've never actually seen a Roadrunner before, dispite spending a disproportionate ammount of time in the desert. Or the fact that the Metropolitan State College of Denver, where I went, uses the Roadrunner as a mascot. Yeah, I didn't know that either until I started getting alumni catalogs from them. In honor of the occasion, here is the complete transcript of a live performance by the Sex Pistols doing "Roadrunner"

enjoy.


'ey, I know, oi, oi, Steve -- Roadrunner!
Roadrunner!Roadrun...!
Should we do roadrunner?
'ey, that's fuckin' awful -- stop it.
Stop it; it's fuckin' awful!
Aaah! Torture.
Duh ug duh duh duh duh mah eyah
I donno the words!
I donno'ow it starts;
I've forgotten it!
Hold on; stop the segment. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop.
Check out what how it starts.
What's the first line?
Paul: One, two, three, four, five, six!
Johnny: Alright, can you start at the beginning, then?
Paul: Roadrunner, roadrunner, (???)
Johnny: I can't hear you, Paul.
Paul: Roadrunner, roadrunner, go...
Johnny:Going faster miles an hourEuhlalalalala
Awith the radio on
Aroadrunner, roadrunner
Aeuhmuh faster miles an hour
Oh, God, I don't know it...
I drove past the Stop 'n' Shop
And I wah by the Stop 'n' Shop
An' I flarala wahbah Stop Shop
Have the radio on
Have touch with the modern world
I fell in love with the modern worldFell in love with (???)
Have the radio on
Roadrunner, roadrunner
Agoin' faster miles an hour
Felt in touch with with modern world
In love with the modern world
Alright, here we go now
Goin' twenty-eight watta power
It's all cold here in the dark
Fifty thousand watts of power
Agoin' faster miles an hour
Awith the radio onRoadrunner, roadrunner
Oh, God, I don't know it
It's fuckin' ridiculousWish I had the words...
Roadrunner, roadrunner
Agoin' faster miles an hour
I felt in touch with the modern world
I fell in love with the modern world
Rockin' modern lover, modern sound, ana mosaround
Modern rockin' runner around, mosaround rockin'
modern runnerin touchAn' a radio on
I got radio onAroadrunner, roadrunner
Oh yeah er ah ee ah eh uh
Do we know any other fuckin' Beatles songs?'
Ey? Brrrrrrr!'Ey? Do we know an...'Ey?
Do we know any other fucking songs that we can do?
Do we know any other songs that we can do?
I can't think of any.

They were Geniuses!

You know it!

Seriously. Look how freakin' cute this kid is--------------->

Sketchbook #2

Ball point pens and highlighters:

This is a pic of Bob Dobbs. I do most of my spontanious drawing at work now, and I don't have access to my art stuff. I use what ever is around. I have even dried out one of the dry-erase markers floating around. I once found a purple pen in the walkway and did a whole "Prince" themed doodle on the back of a meeting agenda. I love ball point pens. I find that one can achieve similar levels of shading as with pencil, but without the messy pinky. It is difficult to erase, but that is why the storage closet gods gave us liquid paper.

A friend of mone once did a whole series of comics using only ball points. The original art work was awesome, but when we tried to print it, some of the detail was lost. These were ash-can photo-copied mini-comics mind you, so we had to give a little.

Look how mean we are:

Seriously. It wasn't enough to buy the suit and cram him in it, but to cart him off to Sears and make him try to smile for an hour? Mean. We should not be parents.

So this is the outfit Jackson is wearing tonight at the neighborhood block party. We'll then retire to the house and hand out candy. If you are in the Stillwater area, and have nothing to do, stop by and marvel at the kid in the chicken outfit.

Insects and the like

We got this --------->

from Grace's mother in law. It covers the carseat, showing just the face. However, if you don't like that, there is a little flap that buttons down over said face. It is very cocoon-like and if they had a pattern of either the the aliens from Aliens or the equally horrific Wilford Brimley from Cocoon, I would have preferred it, but we got cowbows. Whatcha gonna do?

These guys -------------->

Came to Stillwater from Denver to play a show. I miss the Cains. They are good people. We sat and had beers like I never left, and was really refreshing. It was also the first time we left the boy with a stranger, and there was some anxiety associated with that. Mine was curbed with alchohol, while Jen's was not. A mother's instinct trumps all.

We then spent some time in Tulsa, working on the house that is selling this friday. Yay. Good to have that off out backs. Jens parents move the weekend after that into a beautiful new home that they had built, so we helped them pack.

And that was "my weekend"

by little jasey powers, age 9

Most boring day ever.

The email systen at my work is down, and that;s how we get all of our projects. So I sit here with nothing to do. I have been reading trivia on IMDb all day.
In other news, my mom has been here all weekend helping me with the boy, as Jen was out of town at a conference. It was a big help, as I know dick. Thankfully Jen returned last night, and all is returning to normal and whatever I still can't cope with is therefore my own problem.

Sick.

All of us. All three of us huddled under blankets trying to drink as many liquids as possible, then running to the bathroom to pee. Our kitchen counter looks like a pharmacy puked on it. Jackson has a wee little couch that will just break your heart. And trying to care for a sick baby is bad enough when one is healthy, but when one is just as sick, it is no good. I wanted to lay down next to him and wail just as loud. We have to give him anti-biotics that smell like cotton candy in a little plastic syringe, and though he likes the taste, he spits most of it out every time. Now everything he owns has sticky pink goo on it. Luckily, Jen and I both had Monday off, because we would have called in anyway. I didn't change out of my jammies for three days. Now I know how Arthur Dent feels.

I hope the worst is over.

You too, can be a winner!

Sketckbook #1

Well, The DSl I thought was hooked up last week is not working, so I have no pics of Llamas or children or real estate for you. Sorry about that. But if you click on this pic, you can see some of the doodles from my sketchbook. I scanned them while my supervisor went to the bathroom. I hope to show you more, and it may become a regular thing.

The move and busy time at work and no DSL means that I have been negligent in my blogging duties, and thanks to those who have stuck with me.

This week, Jen went out of town to KC for work. That left me with the boy for two days. I did just fine, as did Jack, so stop worrying. His needs are simple: Food and human contact. Both of these things I can provide.

I also learned this week that our parking lot is where kids from the high school next door park when they plan on ditching classes. Ahh.. memories.

Llamas!

I knew moving to rural Oklahoma was going to be a bit of a change from the hustle and bustle of a big city, but come on, llamas? There is a little herd of them a few blocks from my house. Makes me wanna watch Emperor's New Groove again.

The llama is a quadruped.

It lives in the big rivers like the Amazon. It has two ears, a heart, a forehead, and a beak for eating honey. But it is provided with fins for swimming.

Llamas are larger than frogs.

Llamas are dangerous, so if you see one where people are swimming, you shout...

Look out, there are llamas!

Moved!

We have now made the big move. The weekend was spent packing up a giant truck with what was left of our belongings, after the great purge of 2005. We then put everything into a house almost twice the size of the old one, or any of the previous ones for that matter. It looks so sparse, I couldn't believe it. We have spent so long in such small spaces that we are unaccustomed to having so much room to move. I walked the entire length of our old house last night to get a towel.

I'm not storing anything for you, so don't ask.

Hectic Planet

So this is the new house. We close on thursday and move on saturday. It is bigger and nicer than anywhere I have ever live in my whole life. On some subconcious level I don't feel I deserve something this nice just because I've never had anything this nice before. I am really excited, though. It is big enough and affordable enough that I think we could stay here for the next 30 years or so.
BTW, anyone interested in helping me move, can call at any time

Packing Packing Packing

We move to Stillwater in one week. We are packing all of our stuff for the fifth time in our relationship. Jack doesn't know any better, sso he doesn't care. Today we filled our living room with boxes, and while I'm out getting burgers, some realtor calls and wants to show the house. We are both sweaty, and icky and our house is a pile of half packed shambles and knick-knacks. We had an hour to make it presentable and get the fuck out of there. Some how we did it, and went straight to somewhere where we could get a beer. Delicious, wonderful Newcastle.

We have yet to hear back from the realtor.

Canine Crazy

Animals are strange things. After the initial weirdness and uncertainty displayed by our pets about the new wee one in our midst, they have now accepted him as part of the tribe, Ewok style, and will fight any Imperial force to protect him. This weekend, while getting the A/C serviced, Sadie went nuts, and sat next to Jack and growled and barked and carried on until the obviously evil man went away. Had she the time to craft a rudementary hang-glider so she could drop rocks on him, she would have, as I have seen the plans in her kennel. Later, as pictured, Maggie curled up next to him to keep him warm, as the onesie was obviously not getting the job done in the September afternoon heat. Sadie and Maggie make regular checks on him when he is in the other room and usually react quicker than we do when he starts to fidget in the middle of the night. (by we, I mean me. Jen has developed sonar)

The cat does not, nor will she ever, give a shit.

Bottom 10

#9 - When the scene in the trailer is not in the film

I don't know how long this has been going on, if it is a common practice from way back or what, but I hate it. Sometimes it is a really cool action scene, like the bouncing tire from Twister or entire scenes, like "when to count the anniversary" in Guess Who. I realize that both are completely horrible movies, even more so because of this. Sometimes it is forgivable, as with the Spiderman trailer that featured a giant web catching a helicopter between the WTC towers, and a similar one for Men in Black II. Both those were changed after 9/11. Other than that, if the scene isn't in the movie, don't get me all excited, and then not put it in there.

Yep, He's Mine.

For the astute viewers, I am making the exact face that Jackson is. This was not intentional, just genetics. He does the same one-eyebrow raise thing I do, and has the same double-jointed thumb I have. (My Dad and my brother have double-jointed thumbs, though at a different spot.) It would be difficult to deny this child in any court of law.

kudos to Brian B. for the pic. We had a wonderful time at the party, though Jack did not. He cried all night until he passed out. Just like that one girl you knew in high shcool. He's a bit of a drama queen, you see.

Stupid Things I Have Done #2

I once was talked into putting Carmex on my eyeball. I spent the next several hours blinking uncontrolably, while a tingling sensation washed over the right side of my brain. And let me tell you, the more you rub, the worse it gets.

-JP

Where's my beer?

I think Jack is ready for football season. He will join the rest of America, on the couch, in his undies, belly protruding from under a dirty t-shirt, staring at a little talking box for hours on end, getting fatter.

It amazes me at times that he doesn't just get up and go into the kitchen for a cold one, and some more salsa. He looks like such a little man.

The gang's all here!

Driving Miss. Sadie

Curious Jack

This is one of the few pics where his eyes are open and he is not pissed off. Kudos to Norm for taking this one

Bottom 10

#10 - inconsistent highway speeds

I now drive an hour each way to and from work every day. I have now realized that cruise control is the greatest thing ever, and more people should use it. I get all fulla road rage when I go to pass somebody, and they pick that time to realize that they had been going too slow, and speed up, so's I cant pass. OR when people start to pass me, and decide to just pace me instead, and camp out in my blind spot.
If I owned a Road worrier kind of car, I would run these bastards off the road.

Vivid Imagination

more baby

This kid is the coolest. He fusses like crazy sometimes, but then he falls asleep on my chest, and I don't care anymore.

-JP

Stupid things I've done #1

Long ago, in a drunken stupor, my friend Larry and I moved some traffic cones we came across late at night. We move them so that eventually the cars were forced to go the wrong way down a one way street, on the other side of a concrete barrier. We parked at a good vantage point and watched as people tried to figure out what the deal was. Most cars just went back to the other side at the next crossing, or drove between the cones. We sat there for hours, listening to old Abbot & Costello recordings and drinking more beer, even going so far as to go get more alcohol and come back.
As the sun was coming up, and rush hour began, a cop came along to fix the problem. Someone had evidently called to complain about the cones, but not about the two drunk teenagers laughing hysterically in the car down the way. The cop was about half way through moving all the cones, when we could see that a moment of revelation washed over him. He put all of the cones back to the way we had set them, and drove down the block. He then proceeded to start writing tickets to people for going the wrong way down a one way street.

We could not have asked for a better pay off.

kid no sleepy

Disaster movies

I love disaster movies. Actually, I love movies where lots and lots of people die. Shakespeare's tragedies were always my favorites, and I am the only person who has sat through Titus more than once.
Zombie movies hold a special place in my heart, as massive ammounts of people die twice. I like it even more when the death is totally indescriminant. Keep in mind, that as a film lover, most of these movies are never what I would concider good. I mean, come on, Ben Affleck and Bruce Willis are gonna save us from a giant meteor? Piss on Ben Affleck. There are exceptions, of course. 28 Days Later is wonderful, and Peter Jackson's Dead Alive was one of the funniest movies I've ever seen. Then there are some that are almost good, bit do something that really pisses you off. Case in point: The Day After Tomorrow. Lots of death. There is even an entire sequense where giant tornados destroy Los Angeles for no reason at all. It has nothing to do with the plot. So far, so good. people drowning, freezing, falling off buildings and generally having a pretty poor time. Oh, how are the principles gonna make it? (BTW - you can usually tell who is going to survive by how famous the actor is.) Then they go and ruin it. There is a whole sequence where Jake Gyllenhaal gets attacked by wolves. Fucking wolves!! How stupid is that? It was one of the few times in my life that I have actually thrown something at the TV. The others were Iris because there was no point to that movie, and Signs because M. Night Shayamalan is a one trick pony, and his movies are stupid and predictable now. All this wonderful creepy build up for an alien that looks like Barney. Fuck M. Night. Fuck him right in the ear. Overrated bastard.

My favorite Zombie Movies:
28 Days Later
Shaun of the Dead
Dead Alive
George A Romero's Night of the Living Dead
Cemetary Man
My favorite Disaster movies: (or movies where a lot of people die)
Them
The Hindenburg
The Posiden Adventure
Richard III
Reservoir Dogs

-J.

One week

Well, little Jackson is a bit over a week old now and I have learned a few things.

I have learned that to sustain levels of sleeplessness I haven't seen since "back in the day", is a lot harder when I don't have cigarettes, drugs, and insomnia to help me out.

I have learned that extreme emotions are meant to be experienced separately. Seeing Jack for the first time and being extremely happy, while a team of doctors were digging through Jenn's abdomen and there is blood everywhere, and being extremely worried, was a situation I just couldn't wrap my head around.

I have learned that my suspicions that the female of the species is the stronger of the two are most deffinately true. That is one tough chick. Hours of go nowhere labor, a c-section requireing the doc to make the hole bigger half way through to accomodated Jackson's 14" head, staples, stiches, no sleep, pain killers and feeding the little dude every 2 hours! I am not that strong.

I have learned that most of my past or current problems don't mean dick.

I have learned that you can keep your life, personality and habbits when you have kids. You just have to tweak things a bit.

I have aslo learned that I have a lot of friends that genuinely care about me and wish me well.
And the same to all of you.

J3

JWP!!

JWP IS HERE!
Jackson Wesley Powers was born on Sunday.That pic is of me completely terrified because Jenn was about to have a C-section. Everything is fine, and Jenn is doing wonderfully!Jackson is huge. He was 9lbs, 11oz and almost 22 inches long.Born July 17 ay 10:54 pmJenn is hurty, but good. Jackson eats like The Nothing from Neverending Story so as to maintain his fat rolls.Have a look at him in the pictures area. He's a cutie.

More later

arrrgh! It's touchin' me balls!

We just had a giant fuck-up with our house. There is this crazy Inspection Co. called Knox who screwed both us and Jen's Parents over the last few weeks.
They aren't licensed, and they are running a sale right now, so a bunch of people are using them. The In-laws had them out to their house a few weeks ago, and they wrote this scathing report that made it seem as though the house was about to fall over, and they lost the deal because of that. Just our luck, we get the same company and the same inspector. He wrote an equally scathing report on our house. Stupid shit that makes no difference. Our house passed FHA two years ago, and all we have done nothing but make improvements and remodel since then, and now it doesn't pass. WTF? FHA is the most strict loan you can get. He put things in there like: Evidence of wallpaper and wood paneling, which is gennerally used to cover structural defects. huh? I have no wall paper or paneling. The brand new water heater i had professionally installed a month ago was "sub-standard" and our breaker box was not 10 feet above the ground, and therefore a fire hazard. TEN FEET? That list just went on and on like that. I guess all 60 year old houses are supposed to be up to current standards.
So the buyer backed out.
The loan on our new house in Stillwater, (awesome) was contigent on our other house being sold, so we're probably gonna lose that deal too.

adultism

Boy howdy!This week, my house sold. Super cool. We're gonna make a lot of money off it. It was only on the market for six days. This meant that we had to suddenly find a new house in Stillwater quickly. We thought our house was going to take longer to sell, and that we had more time to look, but we didn't. So this weekend, we went up there and looked all day, and the last one we saw was awesome, so we're gonna buy it. It is more expensive that I'd hoped, but really cool, and if we use some of the money we make off our house to pay off our consolidation loan, and the credit cards, and put the rest down on the new house, we should be just fine. We don't have a car payment anymore, so that helps too. We also have a baby comin'. Any day now. So we have to have a baby, do all the inspector's repairs, which may include getting a new roof, and they aint cheap. we have to close on two houses and move from one to the other all in one day. Our savings are shot, because I got a new car that could actually handle a 1 hour commute. Plus we need earnest money and all tha shit for the new homw loan. Stressful!!

Other than that, all is well. Jenn is doing wonderfully, and as the baby is ginormous, we're gonna see on wednesday weather or not we can induce. I think he'll be okay with it as we are full term, and if Jackson gert any bigger, she won't be ablr to push him out.My new job still awesome. I stil cannot believe I landed such a cool job. I make enough money, that I am less weirded out about the higher mortgage looming ahead of me. A good score.Congrats to Craig Conner on the birth of Daniel.

Happy Motoring!

-JP

Dilbert

Okay, I'm not complaining about my new job. I love it. I am doing less and getting paid more than ever before. I guess I'm just not used to corporate life and society. Before, when ever I'd see three or four guys with short sleeves and ties in a group somewhere, I'd think to myself in a dorky inner voice: "Hey, did you guys see Dilbert this morning?" It kind of summed up that kind of guy. After a few weeks here in Corporate America, I have seen that exact scene play out more than once. The guys errupt in laughter so full, they start crying.
I have seen people go totally ape shit because someone brought in bagels. Those horrible 40 packs of cup-cakes with the massive ammount of icing that you see at the grocery store, are cause for great celebration. People would buy special hats if they could on cup-cake day. And the treats disappear faster than a pack of smokes at an AA meeting. The same guy comes back over and over again till they're gone.

I'm not saying these are bad people either. I'm sure they are on the whole very nice and lead very full lives outside of work.

They just kind of scare me.

JP

moving

Off to Stillwater we go!! Jen's job gave her a giant thumbs up for working out of her house in Stillwater after the baby gets here. This means we are a movin' again. This also means that we get to keep our surprisingly large salaries (for us at least) and we don't have to pay for day-care, which costs a surprisingly large ammount of money. Cost of living is a little cheaper, and we get all the amenities of a college town, like cool shows and interesting people, and attractive college kids wandering around, and better coffee. There are only 50,000 people here, not counting students. This is a big deal for us. I'm really excited. We can get a bigger house, as we have to allot a room to use as a home office, and get to write that off of our taxes. I know there are a few of you out there who think I'm going soft. But I just want to dispel the roumers and reassure everyone that I am still the urban rebel I always was. I'm just doing it from a small town with a family, working for one of the largest electronics companies in the world. Punk's Not Dead

the book of Job

So, after almost two months of searching and searching, wondering if Jackson was going to be born into the welfare system, I have finally landed a job. A real one. With an office or a cubical or something. It is as a graphic designer for Creative Labs Inc. You may have seen their Zen brand of MP3 players or have a Sound Blaster in your computer. I'll be designing a little for their website, but mostly their print stuff. It pays more than double what I've ever made in my life. The only shitter is that it is in Stillwater, OK, about an hour away. The town is smaller than Tulsa, but is where OSU is located, so its pretty cool. We may move there depending on how the job works out, and what Jenn can swing with hers after Jackson gets here. Houses and cost of living up there are really cheap, so Jenn probably won't have to go back until she wants to. But I will have gone fronI an really excited that I didn't have to take a shittier job just to get by, and that it is a direct hire and not through a temp place, as one is responsable for me being unemployed in the first place. fuckers.So I start on Tuesday, and I have to find a new car soon because my POS truck can barely make it to the coffeeshop. Wish me luck!

Bandwagon

This is another list thing.
I compulsively make lists because I don't trust my own memory.* This was passed along to me by my good friend Brian who will now have to suffer through reading it. It is a Top Five thing about music. None are in any real order.

Top Five Lyrics That Move My Heart: Luckily Brian has renamed this one to something more managable.

Lyrics That Make My Inner Unicorn Cry:
1 That Was The Day - The The
Seriously. I met my wife at a the the show, and we danced to this song at our wedding. I get a smile every time I hear it. Some commercial is using it, and when I see it, a little aww comes out.

Well you didn't wake up this morning'Coz you didn't go to bed
You were watching the whites of your eyes turn red
The calander on your wall is ticking the days off
You've been reading some old letters
You smile and think how much you've changed
All the money in the worldCouldn't buy back those days
You pull back the curtainsAnd the sun burns into your eyes
You watch a plane flying accross a clear blue sky
This is the day your life will surely change
This is the day when things fall into place
You could have done anything if you'd wanted
All your friends and family think that you're lucky
But the side of you that they'll never see
Is when you left alone with the memories
That hold your life together like glue

2 The State I Am In - Belle and Sebastian

There is always a moment in one's lives when one realizes that they need help.The line: Oh Love of mine would you condesend to help me 'cause I'm stupid and blind. That always gets me.
I was surprised, I was happy for a day in 1975
I was puzzled by a dream, it stayed with me all day in 1995
My brother had confessed he was gay It took the heat off me for a while
He stood up with a sailor friend Made it known upon my sisters wedding day
I got married in a rush to save a kid from being deported, Now she's in love
I was so touched, I was moved to kick the crutches From my crippled friend
She was not impressed cause I cured her on the Sabbath, So I went to confess
When she saw the funny side, we introduced my child brideTo whisky and gin To whisky and gin
The priest in the booth had a photographic memory For all he had heard
And he took all of my sins and he wrote a pocket novel called"The State I Am In"
And so I gave myself to GodThere was a pregnant pause before he said ok
Now I spend my day turning tables round In Marks & Spencer's
They don't seem to mind

I gave myself to sin
I gave myself to Providence
And I've been there and back again
The state that I am in

Oh love of mine, would you condescend to help meCause I'm stupid and blind
Oh and desperation is the Devil's work, it is the folly of a boy's empty mind
Now I'm feeling dangerous, riding on city buses for a hobby is sad
Why don't you lead me to a living end
I promised that I'd entertain my crippled friend

3 Untitled - The Cure.
There is a nasty teenage break up in there.

hopelessly adrift in the eyes of the ghost again
down on my knees and my hands in the air again
pushing my face in the memory of you again
but i never know if it's real never know how i wanted to feel
never quite said what i wanted to say to you
never quite managed the words to explain to you
never quite knew how to make them beleivable and now the time has gone
another time undone
hopelessly fighting the devil futility
feeling the monster climb deeper inside of me
feeling him gnawing my heart away hungrily
i'll never lose this pain
never dream of you again

4 Tom Traubert's Blues - Tom Waits.
This is a great song antway, but now I always think of Basquiat every time I hear it.

Wasted and wounded, it ain't what the moon did
I've got what I paid for nowsee ya tomorrow, hey Frank, can I borrow
a couple of bucks from you, to go
Waltzing Mathilda,
waltzing Mathilda,
you'll go waltzing Mathilda with me
I'm an innocent victim of a blinded alley
and I'm tired of all these soldiers here
no one speaks English, and everything's broken
and my Stacys are soaking wet
to go waltzing Mathilda,
waltzing Mathilda, you'll go waltzing Mathilda with me
now the dogs are barking
and the taxi cab's parking
a lot they can do for me
I begged you to stab me
you tore my shirt open
and I'm down on my knees tonight
Old Bushmill's I staggered, you buried the dagger in
your silhouette window light go to go
waltzing Mathilda,
waltzing Mathilda, you'll go waltzing Mathilda with me
now I lost my Saint Christopher now that I've kissed her
and the one-armed bandit knows,
and the maverick Chinamen,
and the cold-blooded signs
and the girls down by the strip-tease shows go
waltzing Mathilda,
waltzing Mathilda, you'll go waltzing Mathilda with me
no, I don't want your sympathy,
the fugitives say that the streets aren't for dreaming now
manslaughter dragnets and the ghosts that sell memories
they want a piece of the action anyhow go
waltzing Mathilda,
waltzing Mathilda, you'll go waltzing Mathilda with me
and you can ask any sailor, and the keys from the jailor
and the old men in wheelchairs knowthat Mathilda's the defendant,
she killed about a hundred
and she follows wherever you may go
waltzing Mathilda,
waltzing Mathilda, you'll go waltzing Mathilda with me
and it's a battered old suitcase to a hotel someplace
and a wound that will never heal
no prima donna, the perfume is on
an old shirt that is stained with blood and whiskey
and goodnight to the street sweepersthe night watchman flame keepers
and goodnight to Mathilda too

5 Danny boy.This is the best song. Ever.
Oh Danny boy, the pipes, the pipes are calling
From glen to glen, and down the mountain side
The summer's gone, and all the flowers are dying
'Tis you, 'tis you must go and I must bide.
But come ye back when summer's in the meadow
Or when the valley's hushed and white with snow
'Tis I'll be here in sunshine or in shadow
Oh Danny boy, oh Danny boy, I love you so.
And if you come, when all the flowers are dying
And I am dead, as dead I well may be
You'll come and find the place where I am lying
And kneel and say an "Ave" there for me.
And I shall hear, tho' soft you tread above me
And all my dreams will warm and sweeter be
If you'll not fail to tell me that you love me
I'll simply sleep in peace until you come to me.
I'll simply sleep in peace until you come to me.


More to come.*on many levels

H2G2

A lot of people don't realize exactly how important that book is to some people. Although not my first, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy was one of the first actual novels I ever read. I think the first was the Hobbit, but hhg was much more important. My copy has a copyright of 1984, which means I was 9. $3.95. Those were the days. This book was my first sci-fi-humor book but more than that, it was the first time I seen Brittish wit written down. Jeff and I were already fans of Doctor Who, Monty Python, and what ever else channel six showed late on saturday, and early on sunday, so to actually see it written down made me understand what creativity meant a little more. I was pretty creative, but I didn't really get it the way i do now. Things just came to me. Now I have to "think of something" and I hate it sometimes. I read all of the books as fast as my meager allowance would muster, and then read them again. Soon after that we were amazed to see the brittish TV version, which seems so cheap now, but we didn't care. Jeff ordered the tapes of the radio drama all the way from England, and they seemed so special, beacuse we had no idea where it was. We only knew that it was very far away and full of people who seemed so much smarter and more exciting than the people we saw every day. Later we learned that this was not the case, and they just had something called "wit" and we had "reckless abandon" and should just leave it. Jeff and I listened to those tapes over and over and over. Then we reread the books. Then we listened to the tapes again. We quoted it the way people quote Napoleon Dynamite do now. We drew that grinning planet on every notebook, trapper keeper, or sheet of paper we ever owned. When our family finally got a computer, Jeff got the Text Game and i was really jealous because by that time, we were living with different parents, and I couldn't play with it. This soon went away when Neither Jeff nor any of his friends no anyone we ever heard of could get past the dog in front of the pub.

enter pub
YOU CANNOT ENTER PUB
why
A DOG BLOCKS YOUR WAY
move dog
YOU CANNOT MOVE DOG

And so forth. I really hated that game. When they collected the series into a single volume, and had a signing at the Tattered Cover, holy crap, we lost it. partially because we could meet Douglas Adams, but also beacuse there was a story called "Young Zaphod Plays It Safe" included. We followed his career through out Dirk Gently, Starship Titanic, and what ever else he was doing. I remember being truely saddened when I heard of his death on NPR one day in may car. I still remember it. Jeff was the first person I called, and there was this sad sense that something ended and we wouldn't get any more of the material that we loved so much. That is, until jeff sent me an email with a pic of Mos Def holding a book with "Don't Panic" written on the front. I hadn't been this excited about a movie since Episode I. Luckily, I was not robbed of a pay off this time. I re-read the book last night, surprizing my self that I could still read a whole book in one night with out drugs. Then I went and saw the movie today. I have to say I was very very pleased. The problem with Star Wars for people of my gen is that it didn't grow up with us. They are exactly the same thing as before, but we all grew up. "Gosh, they don't seem as sophistocated or cool as they did when I was 8". Ask any 8 year old, and they can't tell the difference between the two. Hitchhiker's did it. It grew at exactly the same pace as we did. Our visual expectations grew and our attention spans shrank. The movie had more than enough of the story and style of old to keep a dork like me not only satisfied, but riveted. It had enough new twists and turns to make me think I was seeing something entirely new. The plot changes onlyt improved the dramatic nature of the whole story. The cast were awesome. Hhaving larger parts for the Vogons, and adding a villan made it more of an adventure and less just a bunch of odd things happening that the characters then had to deal with. I am sure I did not catch all of the cameos, but the ones that I did catch had my eyes popping out of my head (Especiallythe old Marvin). Yes, some of my favorite lines were missing: "You know, its times like these when I'm trapped inside a Vogon air lock with a man from Beetleguese about to die of asphyxiation in deep space that I really wish I'd listened to what my mother told me when I was young.""Why, what did she tell you?""I don't know, I didn't listen!"But that's OK. I might have done without the singing dolphins, beacuse the close up of the book was a cooler opening anyway. All in all, Adams gave this world something really really cool, and he would be happy that nobody has fucked it up.

Fabrisuck

Okay, so I applied for this print shop job through a temp agency, and they tell me to come down and fill some shit out. When I get there, they say that they gave that job away already, but have this other job that they think I can do. It is in the design dept of that fabric place of blogs past. I say fine. They want me to start the next day. I say I can't, cause I have a job and it would be rude to just leave. I say I can be out in a week. they say fine, come back in six days to fill some shit out. So I tell the coffee shop, and they're all upset, but wish me good luck. I get to the temp place and they tell me that the company gave that job away. But there might be another one open in that dept in the next week or so. Good thing I quit that job. She calls me the next day and tells me I can start the next day. Good. I get there, and they tell me that they gave that job to someone else, and they'll just put me in the warehouse till something opens up. Okay, same pay, less demanding work, no prob. After abut two weeks, they offer me a promotion to the "cutting" dept whatever that is. I say fine. They tell me to come in the next day at 10:00 instead of 8:00. I ask if that is the shift hours always, and they say yes. I tell them that might be a prob, as I have baby classes in the evenings. They say okay, and that they will get someone else, but if one opens up, they'll let me know. That was on friday. Sunday night, the temp place calls and says that the company has cancelled my contract, as I cannot work the required hours. How fucked up is that? They tell me not to go in anymore, and to bring my badgr back in and they'll try to get me this other job at a print shop. When I go in, they are total asses to me, and act like it's MY fault that they didn't put me in the right job, or tell me that the hours would change whenever they felt like it. I ask about the print job and they blow me off and tell me that they will call me if anything pops up. Dicks. They make me quit my job, and stick me in a place that dicks me around, and now they won't help me find a new one.I'm gonna burn the building down.

Job Schmob

I started a new job last week. I finally quit the coffee shop and the service industry in general, and took a non union wharehouse job. The company is called Fabricut and they distribute fabric. They are based here but distribute all over. They have a pretty extensive graphics department, and I hope to break into that some day. Not my first choice, but neither was the coffee shop. It's like a grown-up's job. Has insurance and a decent paycheck. I woke up the other day and realized that I was 30, married, a home owner, contributing member of society, and a father. Then I set a cop car on fire and felt much better.

El Patrick

So I'm almost in an auto accident thursday on my way to work. The Highway is elevated, and at one point I pass the Marquee for a Nudie Bar called "Cloud 9", and it reads:

ST PATRICKS DAY SPECIAL
FREE TACO BAR TILL 600


Lord all mighty.

Red Hot

Holee crap I love Frank's Red Hot.Heather O got me hooked on it back in the mid '90s. I got Jenn hooked soon after. Now i put it on all things humans can consume. I use it as a training tool for my dogs. I am collecting wrappers to get the free Frank's Red Hot Offical Dart Board. I started buying the smaller size so I could get it faster. Usually I get the medium size one. Heather O used to get the huge container from Sam's that had a pump attached to it. I was always jealous of that thing. I have a bottle at work, I have secretly stashed one at each of the in-laws houses, and I used to keep one in the car, specifically for use on Sonic's Cheddar Peppers, until I gained too much weight, as I was quitting smoking and eating enough cheddar peppers to choke a Rhino. I guess hgh cholesterol is preferable to black lungs, in which case I'm basically a solid.

sonogram crackers

Hey guess what? our kid is gonna be a boy. Jackson Wesley Powers Pretty cool. He'll be born late July/Early August. Pretty cool. I don't like it when fuckers babble about their kids so that is all you get. You'll have to read the timelife book when it comes out after he gets the death penalty.

true dat

Okay, for those of you who don't know, or who have heard but just didn't believe it. Jenn and I (mostly Jenn) are pregnant. I know what you are thinking, and yes, it is mine. So there you go. Pappa J. Daddy-O. Father Tuck. It is a little weird. It is not as freaky as I thought in most ways, but really freaky in others. I do know this: This child will have blue eyes, freckles, poor eyesight, and a double chin.